paravanes:meditations

Can it ever be a wise choice to turn the other cheek? What does it really mean to "turn the other cheek?" In Matthew chapter five, verses 38 through 40, Jesus says this: "You have heard that it was said, "Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.' But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well." This is one of the most disturbing, frustrating passages in Scripture, because we instinctively know when someone mistreats us and we have a natural inclination to want to do something about it . We want to stop the wrong and heal the pain of the injury. Here, Jesus seems to suggest another path. I don't know if He is giving a formula for every conflict. After all, this is the man who threw the moneychangers out of the temple (John 2:13-16) and called some religious leaders of His day a "brood of vipers." (

--image from health-res.com Something happened today that reminded me of a conversation I had a few years ago with someone who became a friend. Caryn (not her real name, and no, not me) was struggling with maintaining her relationship with her adult daughter. After surviving a painful divorce, struggling to maintain herself and her daughter financially and emotionally, and returning to school to study in a field she'd always loved and wanted to pursue, things were beginning to fall apart for what seemed like the last time. Her comments ended with something like this: "I am the one who has done the right thing, struggled to keep a good home for ------, raised her and helped her through school and college, and now she has no respect or appreciation for me as a person, or as a mother. Both women and men can be victims of parental alienation. I posted about parental alienation here earlier this year. Learn more by visiting paawareness.org . What I finally said to her was this (and

Are you free to tell the truth? Can you always say what you know to be true , not just a "version" or representation of truth? If you cannot freely answer a question, are you free to say "That is not something I can (or will) discuss now?" Are you free to say "I don't know", or "I'm not sure"? Are you afraid of telling the truth, afraid of a consequence of acknowledging and speaking only what is real? Those questions popped into my mind as I read this paragraph from Rock My Soul , by bell hooks . bell hooks is not usually categorized as a Christian writer. Still, her comments on honesty and truthfulness are some of the most Christ-like comments I have read outside of Scripture: "Our integrity is usually challenged not by dramatic moral decisions, but by the small decisions we must make daily about right and wrong, issues that require of us moral reflection. Too many folks believe that hypocrisy and dishonesty have no consequence. The

From Eliabeth Eliot's A Lamp For My Feet , 1985, Servant Publications: "I know of no more steadying hope on which to focus my mind when circumstances tempt me to wonder why God doesn't "do something." He is always doing something--the very best thing, the thing we ourselves would certainly choose if we knew the end from the beginning. He is at work to bring us to our full glory." I found this book by Elisabeth Eliot at a used book sale at Ecumenical Theological Seminary in Detroit in 2006. It has been one of those books with lots of highlighting, dog eared pages, underlining in different colors, starred sections...well, you get the idea. This passage reminds me I am voluntarily choosing to live on God's timetable, not my own. I'm now old enough to appreciate that fact. God always has good ideas and plans for me, better than the ones I choose from my limited knowledge. That's something to get happy about!

--image by Jean Leon Gerome, French artist, 1824-1905 Christians who live in North and South America, and parts of Europe may be immune from the true martyrdom that continues today in many parts of the world. A few summers ago, at a yard party, I spoke with a woman who'd recently made a mission trip to Kenya. She traveled alone, taking food supplies and clothing, and worshiped with a local church in an open air service. She told me how humbled she was by the entire experience. The church members walked several miles one way to gather under a large tree where they sang hymns, prayed, and listened to a sermon preached by a local minister who serves other churches in the area. She said she was impressed by the honest joy and peace shown at that gathering. I thought about how different that gathering must have been than the ones so common here in the U.S. No complaints about poorly functioning air-conditioning, no complaints about busy traffic in the church parking lot, no complaints a