Why Jesus Wisely Advises Turning The Other Cheek

I was saddened today when I read about yet another "Stand Your Ground" related incident in the southern U.S. state of Florida. The exchange between two men in a parking lot led to the death of one and the (possible) criminal prosecution of the other. The two men argued over a handicapped parking space.

I don't normally post about political/social conflicts in the United States because those topics don't normally include ideas I feel led to explore on this blog. Others write very well on those topics. Also, I have readers in other countries who may not be very interested in domestic politics in the U.S. At times, however, there are overlaps between my reasons for writing and managing this blog (Trust the God who is worthy of your love) and what shows up in my news feeds on other platforms.

I don't personally know any of the people involved in this tragedy and my knowledge of the event is limited to news reports. I'd like to share a few thoughts about the incident.

First, I express my deepest condolences and prayers to the family, loved ones, and friends of the deceased person. I make no judgments about the incident because I don't have all of the facts.

Second, I gained new insight today into why Jesus teaches his followers to turn the other cheek.

This news report moved me because I experienced a similar situation earlier this year, during the winter, on a very snowy day.

I pulled into a gas station and parked next to an empty pump. As I exited my car to go inside of the station to pay for my gas, a stranger (still in his SUV) blocked my path and angrily shouted "Didn't you see me trying to get to that pump?!"

Well, actually, I had not seen him trying to get to that pump.

What I said to this man was: "Well, if you want the pump this badly, you can have it."

I got back into my car and drove to another gas station, filled my tank, and continued enjoying a good day.

I could have argued, but I decided not to argue. Why did I decide not to argue? At the time, I wasn't thinking of Jesus' words about turning the other cheek.

At the time, I was thinking :

1. I don't know this person. I have no idea of his state of mind.  Is this person naturally and often violent, does he have issues that cause him to create danger for others?

2.  I have no idea what has just happened to this person. Has he just received bad news about something very important to him?

3.  I have no idea what this person plans to do later today. Is he on his way to a court hearing, a stressful family gathering, or a difficult meeting with an employer or client?

These thoughts ran through my mind quickly, but what stayed with me was this: "I have a life worth living, and I will not lose my life over access to a gas pump."

When Jesus tells his followers to turn the other cheek, he is telling us not to return and re-send to someone else the same type of disruptive anger they have sent our way. In order to throw something, you have to hold it. Jesus advises us not to grab or hold the hostility others send our way. Christ followers are to seek peace and pursue it .  This seeking of peace is not limited to times of meditation while we're alone in a quiet, comfortable place.

We seek peace and pursue it because that pursuit  often offers a way of safety and a way of resolution and an opportunity to minimize the stresses of daily life. This guidance is for our protection, for our self-maintenance, for our peace of mind.

Frankly, it was easier for me to walk away from a potentially deadly conflict than to argue over who gets to pump gas first. I kept the focus on my well-being, not on the angry stranger who wanted to disrupt my day.

Sometimes, it is most important to seek peace and pursue it when everything and everyone around you screams anger and chaos.

I understand the thinking that says "You should have stood up for yourself and not let someone run you away from the gas pump." That is a legitimate point of view, and I respect it. If one ends up in a situation where one is cornered, self-defense is mandatory and must be acted upon..

On that day, I wasn't cornered. I had the option to walk away and not let the other person control the direction of my actions, my energy, the entire direction of my day, or possibly my life. I chose not to fight or argue because these are not things I enjoy. I chose not to grab what was tossed my way. It was OK to say "no" to this man's negative energy and frustration. It was OK not to allow those feelings into my space and my mind.

That is what turning the other cheek is all about.

On some level, this seems counter intuitive because we naturally carry the feeling that says, "I won't allow you to do that (or say that) to me." But consider this: in my case, that statement was already made. It was up to me to decide how to respond. We can't choose what other people do.

We can choose what we will do with other people's choices.

When Jesus tells us to turn the other cheek, he's telling us not to grab, hold, and toss back the anger and the negativity. He's telling us not to pick it up.  Don't recycle it. Let the negativity fall to the ground and go your way.

Obviously, if you're cornered, you must defend yourself.

My experience is a lot of corners can be avoided when you turn and walk away. It's not about being "the bigger person." It's about managing what lives in your mind, your heart, and your experience.

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Note: A recent news update states the Florida prosecutor who has jurisdiction (in the case mentioned at the top of this post) decided not to press charges against the shooter who killed a man in a dispute over a handicapped parking space.